some Chinglish from my students

As I have previously mentioned, my students are pretty delightful and hilarious. If the questions they asked me weren't example enough, I have plenty of further proof. During the first week of classes, I had each of my students fill out a notecard with some information about themselves and how I can make the class most interesting for them. This resulted in some fascinating reading for me -- a lot of fine specimens of Chinglish, as well as a few insights into Chinese culture and perceptions of the US. Here are some of the most entertaining bits:

ENGLISH NAME
Many of my students have very normal English names, though I have a surprising number of students named Alex, Peter, Jack, Summer, or Tony. I also have some male students with names like Emily and Flower. And then I have Bush, Immortal, Lionstrong, Ealth, Little Bai (this sounds like a Chinese textbook name, but the student's Chinese name does not contain Bai), Morning Horse, Fish, Bird, Pixy, Latter, Seven, XO, XF, Bubby, O'Neal (named after Shaq), Kwanza (his misspelling, not mine), Meteor, None (he had to put a special note me that None is his actual name, lest I think he have no name), and Vantasy. I'd love to figure out where all of these names came from.

MAJOR AREA OF STUDY
"the technique of measure and control"
"design and make the airplanes"
"the department of flying vehicle in design and engineering"
"tin fish (a kind of weapon)"
"information countermeasure technoledge"
Yipes! Suddenly "Art" sounds so tame.

WHY ARE YOU STUDYING ENGLISH?
(BESIDES THE FACT THAT YOU HAVE TO)
“I study English to make my childs free from English.”
“English opens the door to a whole new world for me. I'm lovin' it!”
“I have a dream that I can learn about American culture and have fun.”
“To tell the truth, I don't like English, but I have to learn the foreign knowledge. When our country strong enough, foreigners will learn Chinese.”
“Because I think managering a language can be a lot of fun.”
“I think speaking English is just like singing songs and I enjoy singing.”
“1. I don't know the real reason in fact. 2. But perhaps I like English. 3. Maybe just because it's interesting. 4. Probably that's all.”

WHAT ARE SOME TOPICS YOU ARE INTERESTED IN DISCUSSING?
“life, what we should do to make ourselves satisfied, famous people”
“I want to know how a America think a question.”
Many students are also interested in discussing the show Prison Break, which I had never heard of.

WHAT KINDS OF CLASS ACTIVITIES INTEREST YOU MOST?
“I think music can mould one's sentiments.”
“If there're movies, I'll be glad.”
Speeches, because: “I shall have confidence and it's a way to learn many useful skills. Such as how to make me calm down and so on.”
“debates (even though I'm most nervous about it). drama plays (pretty fun!). movies (hottest!).”
“Wow, debating is challenging and exciting, so I can't help waiting!”

I close with a final quote from a student notecard:
“That's Aal All! Thank you for reading! May you happy Everyday.”